I know that the term “stepfather” has a negative connotation to it and we’re supposed to use better sounding words such as “bonus father”, but my mother’s husband has truly stepped in as my father. I have no problem referring to him as my stepfather because that is exactly who he is to me. I thank God that I have him and, right now, I feel as if I am the luckiest person in the world. I know that I’m super sick and suffering and miserable and everything, but at least I have a wonderful stepfather to help me through it! Earlier this month, my husband and daughter and I picked up our lives and moved to a new state for: 1) better career opportunities for my husband, 2) better educational opportunities for my daughter, and 3) better medical opportunities for me. Part of that move left us in closer proximity to NY, with even the possibility of getting there by car. In the middle of all this craziness with settling in a new world, the osteomyelites kicked in big time. I have had pain running down the entire side of my body and my vision has deteriorated horribly. I have needed to get to NY for medical attention from my oral surgeon there but had a very difficult time getting anyone to help me, as it seemed all family members (not that there are many to begin with) were overrun with responsibilities and responsible medical aids were not available due to ridiculous reasons such as hurricanes. I hate not being able bodied enough to travel independently! Upon overhearing my desperation, my stepfather got in his car and drove half a day to my home and then spent another day driving me to New York. At this moment, I am safely tucked away in the hotel that my mother had arranged for us and I know I’m going to be o.k. throughout the procedures this week because my stepfather is here with me. While I wish I was independent enough to face this week on my own, I’m glad to have my stepfather here with me. He can’t possibly make the pain go away, but he sure does make me feel like smiling!
(c) Susan B Spitzer, PhD 2019